The McHousehold
by Lizzy Rebel
Summary: [complete MF MD] McDreamy, McSteamy… meet McJuicy
1. McJuicy

**Disclaimer:** I do not own _Grey's Anatomy_

**Teaser:** McDreamy, McSteamy… meet McJuicy

**Notes:** God, I'm having so much fun with Chris O'Donnell's character. I'm frightened he's pushing his way into my heart. Much like Derek did…

* * *

**/The McHousehold/**

_/Chapter One: McJuicy/_

"You're good at that," Meredith admits gingerly, sipping on coffee as he leans over the desk she's put between them. Sort of like a barrack.

"Hmm? Good at what?" Finn Dandridge asks easily, amusing himself with making eyes at the neckline of her scrubs.

Okay, it's more like he's trying to undress her with his eyes. What's bad is, it's working.

And she likes it.

"That smile. That: 'let me take you to the Casaba' smile." Meredith takes another deep sip of coffee, trying not to smile over its rim. Instead, she tries to frown and fails. "I don't even know where the Casaba is."

"And, since I'm such a terrible sex fiend, I do." Finn leans deeper across the table to toy with a strand of Meredith's golden hair. "So how 'bout? Casaba? Sound good to you?" He gives her another one of those grins she's realized are not practiced or rehearsed, but a natural part of his personality.

_Calm down. Remember. Knitting._

It is tucked into her pocket in her white coat, the needles jabbing at her thigh. It's like a ticking reminder. _No sex. No sex. No sex._

"Sorry. I'm an intern. We don't have time for Casabas. That and I'm celibate. You might remember."

"Oh, right. The _knitting_ thing." Finn retreats but Meredith feels that his pressure hasn't left. And, really, it hasn't left since he first smiled at her. "You know, when a pretty woman like you gives up sex for knitting, the world is very close to ending."

She is not smiling. Meredith tells herself that.

But, of course, she _is_.

"Listen, sex hasn't had the best effect on me. Taking a break is a good thing." Grasping for straws, she rips out her knitting needles and pathetic looking sweater. "Look at this! That's dedication. I'm dedicated."

Finn frowns at it, picking at one of the large holes in the yarn's material. "What is it again? A holey blanket?"

"It's a sweater!"

"Of course. I knew that. I was just testing _you_."

Meredith's lips twitch despite her best effort. "Look, I really like you—"

"That's good. I find it generally better for both parties all around if they like each when they have sex," Finn cuts in, keeping his amicable grin on his face.

"—but," she goes on, like he hasn't said anything all. "I'm serious about the no sex thing. We could be friends. We could try that. The friends thing is working out really well, actually."

The frown that is on his face is just as amused as his smile. He hands her back her knitting. "But I wanna be original. I don't want to do anything your total asshole boss—"

"Derek's not an asshole," she interrupts immediately. She wonders absently what made her tell him about her relationship with Derek Shepard. He was—and is—just so dammed charming that she found herself telling him everything before she could stop herself. "He's just… just…"

"…a total asshole," Finn suggests, taking her coffee and tossing it toward the trashcan. "Caffeine, not good for you. You're a doctor, you should know that."

"I like my caffeine," she snaps but she is enjoying herself entirely too much to actually be mad at him. It's hard to be pissed off at one Finn Dandridge. "You owe me another cup of coffee. And not the crap they give us here for free."

"Alright," Finn agrees with a nod. "We'll consider it a date."

"No. No date. You'll buy me coffee and bring it here, while I'm on call."

"You make it very hard to trap you into dating," Finn protests, spreading his palms flat against the smooth surface of the desk.

Sweet God… his muscles are rippling—_rippling_—underneath his shirt. Good thing she has given up sex. It could have gotten bad.

"I'm not complaining."

"Mere," Izzie Stevens says casually, flipping her golden locks behind her back. She greets Finn with a charming smile. "Doc Dandridge."

"Izzie, right? Funny, I make a habit of knowing beautiful woman." He glances back over at Meredith, his eyes aglow with humor. "See, Meredith? Look what you're doing to me. I don't even know your highly attractive friend's name."

Christina saunters in, clipboard in hand. She plops herself down into a seat beside Meredith, kicking up her sneakers and flipping through the files. She ignores all three of them.

Finn is never one to simply allow an introduction to go unanswered. "And you are?"

"So not interested."

When Finn bursts at laughing, Izzie adds, "Christina Yang. Don't mind her, the stick is permanently up her ass. No surgery can fix it. God knows we tried."

"Ah, just like my father. I'm sorry for your loss," he tells Meredith and Izzie. "She looks like could make a good, sarcastic friend."

"She is occasionally," Meredith puts in and notes that Christina's eyebrows have risen a fraction of an inch. She's just as interested as they are.

"Izzie," Finn addresses the surgeon. "I'm just trying to convince Meredith to go to the Casaba with me. But she claims she knits now instead of having sex. Tell me there's a loophole somewhere."

"Sorry," Izzie says as she digs around her pockets for her own, much prettier, sweater. "Me too."

"It is a sign of the apocalypse," Finn tells them mournfully and faces Christina. "How 'bout you? Are you 'no sex, no service', too?"

"I have brutally hot sex every night," Christina intones morbidly. "And he's a surgeon. Future chief of surgery."

"Well, how can I compete?" Finn turns and grins down at Meredith again. "Pity sex, then? I've just been shot down."

She thinks, for a moment, that Finn's grin should be illegal.

"Go before I call security for harassment," Meredith warns lightly. But she's joking and they both know it. There's a smile on her lips.

"Well, I don't like being arrested," Finn mutters mostly to himself and suddenly leans in toward Meredith again. "Just one question, this no sex thing, does that involve oral—"

"You didn't go there," Meredith says, flabbergasted, as Izzie lets out a giggle and Christina gives a barely noticeable snort from behind her chart.

"Okay. I didn't." He waves his hand as he turns. "See you later, Doctor Grey. I've got a feeling I'm going to come down with a bad cold _really_ soon."

When he's walking away, Izzie leans in and whispers, "So what's his name? McHotty?"

Meredith shakes her head. "No. I've already decided. McJuicy."

"McJuicy?" Izzie crinkles her nose, glancing at Finn's retreating back. "I think McHotty's better. Or McHunky. Or McDrooly. Or—"

"Izzie?"

"Yeah?"

"Look at his ass."

"Oh." Izzie blows at a breath, shifting hair from her eyes. "I see. Yes, juicy. McJuicy." She holds two fingers in front of her face and pinches the air. "Very McJuicy."

"Well, I've got McHot-Surgeon. I win," Christina declares, slapping her chart shut and sitting up in her chair.

"You're not doing it right," Izzie points out calmly, smiling down at Christina. "It has to have a Mc, then an adjective, and _then_ a –y at the end."

"_Please_. McHot-Surgeon."

"Fine, whatever. Don't play by the rules." Izzie grins and glances over at Meredith, who is grinning quite stupidly as well. "_You_ didn't get to see that ass."

"Actually, I did," Christina puts in and causes both blonde women's eyes to fall on her. She shrugs. "I'm a surgeon. I have good eyes. And I had them on his ass the second he turned around. Duh."

"Juicy," Meredith mutters.

A grin, confident and ala Beverley Hills, flirts across Christina's face. "Oh yeah, juicy."

"Are you going to let him take you to the Casaba?" Izzie asks her and they both know the Casaba she's taking about is a bed and sea of blankets.

"I don't know," Meredith admits. She pats her knitting. "I'll decide when I'm done with my sweater."

Izzie rolls her eyes. "If that's what you want to call it." She walks away, grinning.

"Stop thinking about his ass," Christina snaps, thrusting her clipboard at her. "You're celibate. Go look at a disease or something."

Meredith grips the clipboard between her breasts and bursts out laughing.

* * *

**notes:** I bet you're wondering: hey, angst? I thought there was going to be angst. Well, there is. See, I just don't see Finn Dandridge very angst-filled. And I like him that way. We'll leave the moany-angsty-ness to people like Derek and Meredith and Addison, alright? Speaking of Addison, she's the main character next chapter. Haha. Her life sucks. 


	2. McDreamy

**Disclaimer:** I do not own _Grey's Anatomy_

**Teaser:** McDreamy, McSteamy… meet McJuicy

**Notes:** I'm glad ya'all are liking it so far! Makes me happy to know I'm loved! XD Here's chapter two, out early. It's just easy for me to post these babies 'cause they're so short. Consider yourself very, very lucky. Alright, here's some angsting on Derek and Addison's parts. They strike me as people who angst. A lot.

* * *

_/Chapter Two: McDreamy/_

The flu is sweeping Seattle and it sinks its sharp claws into Derek Shepard.

So he is miserable and sniffling when his wife, Addison, walks into the door, keys slapping against her palm. There is a whistle in her voice as she calls out a greeting to her bedridden husband.

He tries not to resent her for standing in front of the bed, chipper and fresh, as is her nature.

That doesn't mean, in some form or another, that he doesn't.

"How are you?"

"Sick," he answers, rolling away. Her voice has never annoyed him so much before. It drills itself into his head.

Almost absently he waits for the cerebral matter to soak his pillow, surprised when it doesn't happen.

"Mmm…" Addison strips away her heels, tossing them onto the floor. Normally, the disorder would have bothered her. But she has resigned herself to the fact that trailers are never meant to be in complete order.

For a minute they stand—well, Addison stands—in taunt silence. Addison hates silence. She wishes Derek would yell. Hastily, nearly panicking, she grasps for something to fill the void.

"So, McJuicy was at the hospital today. First time I met him."

"Mc… who…?" Derek grumbles, meeting Addison's eyes. He is the only Mc-person he knows of. And he's McDreamy, for whatever reason.

He's claimed not to care for the name, but in reality it's quite flattering. Even if he will never admit it.

"Juicy," Addison supplies. "The vet for Doc. Apparently, he likes Meredith's doe-eyed look as much as you did. He's been in the hospital on and off for a week."

He is not jealous. Even as his fingers clench briefly, that is what Derek tells himself as he forces his wary to sit up on the bed. His eyes are suspiciously bland and casual as he meets his wife's eyes.

Or at least, he tells himself they are. "And he met you because…?"

"He was looking for Meredith. He assumed I'm one of the girls," Addison says lightly, careful not to notice _that_ look in Derek's eyes. It's too painful. She's become the master of overlooking the emotions in people's eyes.

She thinks of it as a survival skill. If you don't know it's there, than it doesn't exist.

"But you're not. One of the girls. You're an attending."

"I know. That's why I only heard about McJuicy in passing," Addison admits, turning her back on him and heading into the kitchen. "Izzie and Christina were oozing over him. Well, Izzie was. Christina never oozes, I'm under the impression. She just gets sarcastic. Anyway, bets are on about him and Meredith."

"Oh?"

That syllable says everything. One simple _oh_ speaks volumes to her. Addison sighs, dipping her hands under the faucet for no other reason than the fact that she needs them to do something.

"So far, Meredith's still doing the knitting thing."

Okay. Derek shifts himself back down on the bed, trying not to give a sigh of relief.

Knitting was good. Knitting meant no sex. No sex meant no sleepless night wondering what asshole was warming her bed. No wondering what asshole was warming her bed meant no guilt.

No guilt was good.

"Thing is, no one thinks that's gonna last thing. Not even Meredith." Addison is pushing, and she knows it. She almost wants Derek to explode, at least then her fear will have some tangibility and she will not feel so stupid. She hates being stupid.

"Really?"

Has her husband become the king of loaded one words?

"Yeah. Meredith finds a way to place herself at the front desk at the exact same time everyday. She smiles a lot now. And her knitting is… lax…"

"Lax," he repeats and rolls onto his stomach, resisting the urge to rub his face. _Lax? In her knitting? What the hell does the mean?_

"Yes. Lax." She pads softly back into the small bedroom, eyeing her husband as he deflates himself in the mattress. For a fleeting moment, she bites her lip. But the imagine of a vulnerable Addison Forbes Montgomery Shepard never stays long. "Derek?"

"Yeah?" his muffled voice sounds from underneath his pillow.

"Do you want something to eat? Soup? I could make you some soup."

He lifts his head and looks at her. Again, he resists the urge to resent her. He's not sure why, either. Why he resents. Sometimes he just resents everything. Then he realizes how childish that idea is and forces it from his mind.

Deliberately, he turns his head back to his pillow. "No. I don't have much of an appetite." Which is lie. He's always hungry, starving.

Just not for food.

She turns away again, keeping her head high and her shoulders straight. She grabs a soda, doesn't take the alcohol like she is tempted to. She doesn't scream like she is tempted to. Doesn't cry like she is tempted to. Doesn't accuse.

It won't do any good, even if it will give her momentary release. She is too strong a person for that.

But sometimes, it sucks being a strong person.

They have secrets, she tells herself. And they keep them.

Hers is that she spent their year apart with Mark Sloane. Meredith's McSteamy. Spent it with him in guilty pleasure and declining happiness.

His is that his love for Meredith Grey still burns bright and true his chest. Burns with a hot, white intensity. She's no idiot, she knows that. She sees that.

Only thing is, it's supposed to be a secret. She isn't supposed to _know_.

And she almost hates him for knowing.

But she doesn't. If she did hate Derek, she wouldn't be with him, accepting his jealousy over the relationship another woman is growing.

Meredith is lucky, Addison thinks for the first time. There is always another Mc-something-or-other waiting for her. All Addison has is McDreamy.

A McDreamy who desperately craves someone else.

She slides into bed, trying not to disturb the cocoon of depression and frustration and self-disgust he has created. She stares at the ceiling for a long, silent moment.

Then she says, "Goodnight, Derek."

There is a shift of the covers as Derek answers, "'Night, Addison."

Even as his breathing is deep, she stays awake, staring out into the nothingness. The black void stretches out before her like a coil of ribbons. With a jolt she realizes that the nothing has become her life.

In the beginning Addison felt sorry for Meredith Grey. After all, she hadn't known her Doctor McDreamy had a Mrs. McDreamy. She had been a wide-eyed intern, needing the connection with Derek as much as Derek needed it with her.

If anyone was to get hurt in the desperate, and bitter, love triangle Addison would have pointed to Meredith. And for so long it seemed that the assumption was correct. Meredith walked around the hospital like a ghost, like a girl whose first boyfriend had dumped her. She hadn't been able to move on. Meredith had only been able to look back and cling, trying desperately to find some way to fix the broken puzzle her life had been.

Addison had felt sorry for her.

Now it looked like Meredith might be the one better off. The one who managed to survive.

That McJuicy looked more than willing to pick up the pieces that Meredith Grey had become, sharp shards and all.

It was ironic, Addison thinks.

Stiffly, softly, she turns onto her side and sleeps.

* * *

**notes:** there, see? Angst. Addison and Derek angst. Because they do it so well. Though seriously? Whether or not Derek and Meredith get back together, I don't think Addison and Derek are going to last to the third season. There's just too much in the way for them. The marriage is doomed to fail. I also think that Derek needs some time to be single. He should give that a try.

Reviews 

**Heather0210**: Finn is adorable, isn't it? Chris O'Donnell makes me a fangirl. I dun why either. Maybe it's the Robin thing.

**Luv24+Alias:** at the beginning I wasn't too sure if anyway was ready for a Finn/Meredith relationship (I didn't think I was) but now…

**Greyaddict:** McJuicy was the first thing that popped into my head when I saw him. Yum, McJuicy.

**nicola:** I don't mind Addison so much. But, yeah, sometimes she annoys me. God, if _I_ cheated I wouldn't have the gull to go back to my husband.

**specialfrog:** I miss season-one!Meredith, don't you? Now she's all think: 'where's my McLife?' When I saw Finn I was struck with the thought that maybe she was chasing after the wrong McMan.

**DORKY GiiiRL:** I had so much fun writing the Izzie/Meredith/McJuicy scene. It just reminds me of something normal women would do. Ogle a hot guy's ass.

**ilajkajas2215:** I just really want Finn to be a fun-loving guy. Derek was a pretty fun-loving guy too, but with all the undertones of a 'my-life-miserable' guy. I just want Finn to happy and awesome!

**FuzzyPenguins:** XD I am, see? I had so much fun writing this that I had to update immediately. That and it's short. Real short.

**Lizzie9:** yeah, chapter one was funny. Two bad the other two aren't. Eh.

**Chaosti:** I'm glad. I always worry about keeping people in character. It's important to me.

**sketchysteph04:** flirting is cute, when done the right way. Finn's awesome like that.

**Jessabelle87:** why thank you. I do try, you know.

**papaslittleci:** continued to the eXtreme. And by eXtreme I mean with the most angst possible.


	3. Meredith

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Grey's Anatomy

**Teaser:** McDreamy, McSteamy… meet McJuicy

**Notes:** had to get this out before the outage tonight. XD Just wanted to get posted. Tomorrow I have A.P. exams… so updating tomorrow was out of the question. God, I have A.P. on Wednesday too… I'm terrified...

* * *

_/Chapter Three: Meredith/_

They meet on the trail. They never plan it. It's better to think it's an odd, unplanned, coincidence, even though it's not.

As usual, Meredith greets him with a smile. Derek answers it and motions her over. Doc, fully healed and just a bit wild, rushes around them.

"So how are you feeling?" Meredith asks, hooking her hands into her down jacket.

"Better," Derek answers and tries not look at her. She comes to stand by his side and he tries to see if there is a noticeable difference. If she and McJuicy were going at it would he know? Would there be some difference in her posture?

Men like to whistle—or, at least, he does—and sometimes women hum during their mundane chores. If he remembers correctly, Meredith has a habit of smiling at the tiniest, insignificant things.

But would he notice?

He, after all, never saw George coming.

"That's good. A week. You had us worried, Doctor Shepard," Meredith teases, her voice light and friendly. He can't remember a time when it had been darkened with passion, husky from lusts and needs.

McJuicy might know, he thinks, battling surging anger.

"So are you, ah, still knitting?"

She sends him a sidelong glance. Then looks forward. "Yeah."

"Oh."

"Oh? What does that mean?" she demands, hitching a shoulder. "Are you using it as a metaphor for sex? Everyone seems to be doing that these days."

"No," he lies and then pauses. He whistles Doc over and the mutt comes to him, branch caught in his slobbery muzzle. Derek takes it and sends it flying. Doc zips into the trees after it. "Yes. So are you?"

"Are you asking as my friend? Or my not-friend?"

"I'm your friend, remember? We're not not-friends anymore."

"Well, sometimes you act like a not-friend. Mostly a friend, but there is a hint of not-friend in there. So, I want to know, are you asking as a not-friend?"

"No," he lies again and doesn't bothering admitting it's a lie. "I'm asking as a friend. In fact, I'll do one better. I'll be a big brother and beat the crap out him for looking at you." Which will give him satisfaction, but for a purely different reason.

"You wouldn't be able to," Meredith counters with a grin back in place.

"Hmm? I punched Mark pretty good. Remember?"

"Yeah. But Mark works with wannabe celebrates and rich socialites. Finn works with animals. Big, tough, burly animals. His face might actually break your fist if you try to punch him," Meredith warns him with a roll of her shoulder. "And those hands of yours are worth two million dollars."

It feels like she is so oddly brushing him off that it hurts. And still, he listens to her words, trying to see who she is protecting. Finn Dandridge or him.

"So this McJerky—"

"McJuicy. We call him McJuicy. And how did you know?"

"Addison. Sometimes she's confused as one of the girls."

"But she's not. One of the girls. She's an attending." Meredith shakes her head, sending her messy top of locks over her eyes. Derek remembers being able to brush them aside.

Against his side, his hand itches.

"This Mc_Juicy_, you like him? A lot?" he asks as they began a slow walk down the slope of the hill. The birds sing above their head and there is something dazzlingly wonderful about standing with her.

The guilt wells up, thinking this. Since he's never taken the time to go on walks with Addison like this.

Meredith sends him another sidelong glance, debating on whether he's a friend or a not-friend. Then she gives a small sigh, a tiny, secret smile working its way across her lips that has Derek quaking deep in his sneakers.

"I guess. He's funny. I haven't… laughed in a while, you know?" She looks quickly up at him, blinking. Then she looks down. "Not because of you so much. Well, not anymore. But just everything. George. My father. My family. Everything."

"Yeah. It's good that you're laughing," he tells her quietly. And that, at least, is the truth.

"You think?"

"Hmm."

They walk on for a bit longer in silence. Meredith's eyes are somewhere far off and thoughtful. She pursues her lips for a moment, then gnaws them, then grins.

"I like him," she tells Derek softly and it breaks his heart. Because all he hears is _friend_ in her voice. "I mean, like a lot. And he's just so… persistent."

"So are you going to give up knitting?"

"No. At least, not yet." She smiles again, that secret smile he thinks he will always dread. Before, Meredith would have been careful about what she talked about around him. Men especially. But now…

Now she is too busy to concern herself with a love she doesn't believe exists.

And so he thinks: _oh, Meredith…_

"If… Meredith, if you like him, you should go after him. Right? He's a nice guy, isn't he?" Derek asks, not sure suddenly why he is asking. Only, he is and he can't seem to stop.

"He's the best," Meredith says quickly before she can stop herself. Then she fumbles, which is rare for Meredith Grey.

Derek thinks Meredith never fumbles.

"Well then…" he breathes, not sure what else to say. _Well then_ is highly inadequate he knows, but he can't think of anything else to say. Because all he really wants to say is that he wants their almost-but-not-quite-friendship to be all she ever needs in the way of men.

It is selfish and he likes to think he is not a selfish man.

But it is hard to be selfless when he imagines another man running his fingers through Meredith's hair, feeling her melt and sigh against him. Those baby blue eyes of hers darkening into some almost black.

There have been other men since him, Derek knows. But Meredith has never sighed or smiled over them.

"Do you think I should, Derek?" she asks suddenly, the hitch in her voice surprising them both. She sounds like a youth seeking advice from the elder.

He looks at her, struck with the knowledge of how the caretaker of a broken bird must feel. He spends his time caring for a Meredith, mending her wings, or trying to. Watching her health progress into the green. And then, suddenly, she is ready to fly. And you almost want to hold them.

But the birds always get to fly in the end.

"If you really like him…" he starts and takes a small pause. He draws in a breath. "If you do, Meredith, then yeah. I think you should."

The smile that is on her face is watery and sad. Yes, it's over now. They both know. It's over between them now.

Or maybe, Derek tries to reason with his shattering heart, it'll never be over. They can't forget what they felt for each other in that brief half-year, right? Even if wives and boyfriends muck up the future and present, those pristine and happy moments between them must remain.

"I should go," Meredith says.

"Yeah," Derek agrees, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

She walks away and he watches her, wishing he could tell her that he feels like she is ripping his heart out of his chest. But he doesn't. That is a line he may never cross again. That is a line he drew himself.

Regrets swell inside him and then—

Meredith looks back, and her smile is radiant. "Thanks, Derek, for being a friend."

Her words break him and she will never know. His eyes are suspiciously dry as he manages that cocky McDreamy smile for her.

"No problem, Meredith."

He lifts his hand in a wave and she walks off.

* * *

**notes:** aw, let's a take a moment and feel bad for Derek. Okay we're done. He's the one that chose Addison, remember? Meredith has every right to move on. At least, I think she does. She _should_ move on. Luckily, Finn's there!

And yeah, there's going to be another chapter. Since no one started cursing my family to the darkest depths of hell for pairing together Finn and Meredith I decided to add a heavy Meredith/Finn chapter. For kicks!

**Reviews**

**luv24+Alias:** for some reason I like Derek jealous, too. I mean, I kept waiting for the big blow out when Derek found out Meredith was sleeping for George. Never happened. I had a very WTF moment.

**specialfrog:** I can see Finn doing some chasing! XD And he does, in the story. But the ball is in Meredith's court, obviously.

**TivoforSteavo:** I'm glad everyone's in character! Making OOC is one of my greatest fears, you know.

**SBandJasonSamfan:** er… I'm not going to promise you Meredith/Derek because well… it's not happening. I have other heavy Meredith/Derek fics if you wanna check them out… hehe…

**Heather0120:** I sometimes feel bad for Addison. Bad in an you're-an-idiot kind of way. I mean, c'mon. She _got_ McSteamy. What she's complaining about?

**ilajkajas2215:** I'm glad you do! This story is my first chaptered Grey's Anatomy story so well… thanks for the compliment!


	4. Something

**Disclaimer:** it applies

**Teaser:** McDreamy, McSteamy… meet McJuicy

**Notes:** yay, okay. It was supposed to be up this Wednesday. But you know what? I forgot I have frigging AP exams this week! Gah! Well… at least it's over. But I have SATs tomorrow and I'm so tired… so I didn't manage to get this up until now. And then… it's because if I read the SAT book _one_ more time I'll explode.

Wait… and _what_ is Derek calling Meredith next episode? Oh no… they _didn't_!

* * *

_/Chapter Four: Something/_

It takes two days for Meredith to call Finn. The entire time Izzie is peering into the doorway, rolling her eyes when she finds Meredith has not moved from her position on her bed.

"Meredith," Izzie says as she thumps a hand on her hip. "Call him. He's McJuicy. He's available. And he's into you."

"Yeah. I know. But—"

"But what?"

"Nothing," Meredith breathes and is oddly near tears. There is _nothing_. "There's nothing. There's nothing there. I _need_ something there."

With a sisterly nod, Izzie struts into the room like a mother hen. She fiddles with Meredith's hair—as if Finn can see her over the telephone—and hands her the phone.

"Maybe," Izzie suggests, "if you call him there will be."

And maybe, Meredith realizes, that's what she is afraid of.

She calls him up and doesn't bother taking out the slip of paper he had pressed into her palm. She's memorized his number it by heart.

"Finn," he groans into the phone and Meredith has a hard time not drooling over the image of a rumpled Finn lifting a tired head from his bed. "If your dog isn't throwing up his lung, you better hang up _now_."

"You told me my dog was fine," Meredith jokes lightly, pressing a hand to her heart as it thumps loudly—and painfully—against her chest.

God, what is she, a fifteen-year-old on her first date?

"Meredith?" Awareness flutters into his voice. "Damn. It's ten. You can only call me when I can be unbearably sexy for you. One minute." He coughs and shouts a warning to the dog that is barking in the background. "Okay. I'm in sexy mode. I'm ready to sweep you off your feet."

"That doesn't seem likely," Meredith points out with a small laugh, cradling the phone against her ear. "You're ten miles away."

"Obviously I was speaking metaphorically."

"Obviously."

"Unless," Finn adds as he drops his voice another level with easy grace. "You want me to come over? I'd be happy to do some sweeping. You'd find I'm good at sweeping. I've been complemented on it many times."

Meredith doesn't doubt him as she leans back against her pillows, tugging absently on her shirt. "Oh? Complemented by who?"

There is a pause. "Ah… my mother. Yeah, my mother told me."

"You swept your mother off her feet?"

"Did I say my mother?" Finn laughs, aiming for a nervous sound but failing. He's enjoying this as much as she is. "Obviously I meant… that I… _wasn't_ complemented at all. I'm a liar."

"A liar, huh?" Meredith grins, big and wide, and wraps a strand of hair around her finger. "I'll have to remember that when you say I'm beautiful."

"You are beautiful," Finn says mock-forcefully.

"I'm not going to believe a liar."

"You, Meredith Grey, are a tease." Finn gives a husky laugh and she hears the shift of his sheets as he rolls over.

She tries fruitfully not to imagine a naked Finn wrapped up in white, bland sheets.

Meredith Grey is a miserable failure.

If Meredith had been able to think, she might have worried about drooling. Or she might have considered Finn warranted drooling. Or she might not have given a damn.

But a naked Finn has a unique ability to drive out all coherent thought patterns.

After all, Finn has _rippling_ muscles. Meredith licks her lips absently. Then realizes she is licking her lips. She laughs at herself.

"What?" Finn demands and there is another shift of covers. Meredith nearly sighs in ecstasy. "What is it?"

"N—nothing."

"Oh God, you have another guy there, don't you?" Finn gives a small moan of pain as he accuses her. "You've just finished having incredible sex and called to let me know."

"Why would I do that?"

"Because life is cruel, Meredith. Life is cruel."

She giggles and presses a hand to her lips to stop them from smiling so ridiculously. "I'm not having incredibly hot sex, Finn. Don't worry. In fact, I spent my day reading."

"Reading? What's wrong with that? I enjoy a good Tom Clancy or Michael Crichton book every now and then, but I could never get into Nora Roberts."

"Yeah, but I was reading the _Grapes of Wrath_."

"Uh."

"By choice."

"Ouch." Finn's wince is almost audible of the line. "I'm so sorry. I think you need sex. And, though it pains me greatly to offer, I suppose I'll have sex with you. For the good of the world, you understand."

"Oh," Meredith nods seriously, flipping hair out of her eyes. "Of course. You're such a martyr."

"A martyr who likes sex," Finn agrees and sighs deeply.

Meredith laughs loudly and for the first time since she can remember it has a ring of truth. She curls onto herself and tells him, "Finn? This isn't why I called."

There is another small pause on the line. "Well, I can only imagine it's not too good if you're not calling to tell me you've decide to hot, crazy sex with me."

"Well—"

"Meredith, I'm willing to try to make this 'friends' thing work with you, since I like you. But you gotta give me time," Finn protests and he sounds a little panicked. "I mean, I can't stop imaging you naked just like that and you're so damned hot and I happened to like hot women so—"

"I want to go out with you."

"Beside, I am a red-blooded… ah… what?"

Because it doesn't sound nearly as bad now that she's said it, Meredith giddily repeats, "I want to go out with you."

"Can you say that again?"

She blinks and repeats once more, "I want to go out with you?"

"One more time."

"Finn."

He laughs merrily and she hears him plop himself back onto the pillows of his bed. "Okay. It's just that… I never thought I'd hear you say it. I mean, I've imagined it… of course, the fantasy usual details us, alone, and you wet somehow. You tell me you're madly in love with me and then proceed to strip off—"

"I'm not having sex with you," Meredith interjects, adding a silent 'yet' in her head.

"Ruin all my fantasies, why don't you?" Finn doesn't sound too upset and that's because he knows he'll get her in bed one-way or the other. Meredith knows it, too.

It doesn't bother her so much.

"Finn?"

"One second, Meredith," Finn replies and it sounds like he is standing. "I gotta go check the front door."

"Why? It's ten."

"Well, I've been so hot and bothered lately that I figured once hell froze over Satan would stop here first," Finn replies and they both share a small laugh. Then he asks, seriously, "Honestly, Meredith? Going out?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Why changed your mind?"

"I dunno, really." She thinks of Derek in a wistful way, smiling at her and letting her go. _Letting her go._

For the first time in over a year, Meredith doesn't cling to some fake hope or lost faith. After so long of being wounded, Meredith is ready to risk herself again. Gamble on another man.

"I think, maybe, it's just time for me. To, I guess, give it another try."

"I'll make it worth your while, Meredith," Finn swears in a serious tone that is out of character for him. "I'm not an asshole."

"I hope so. And I know."

Just a quickly as the seriousness comes, it leaves. Finn is grinning again as he asks, "So when do you want to go out? God, tell me it's soon. And where?"

"Well, I'm pulling long shifts the next two days—"

"—_Meredith!_"

"—but after that I'm free for a bit."

"Alright. Alright. I'll suffer in silence since I _know_ you'll make it worth my while." Finn yawns lightly and she hears him struggling with his covers. "D'ya mind if I go back to sleep, Meredith? I need my beauty rest now, especially if we're going on a date. I want to be sexy for you."

She stops herself from saying she suspects he's unbearably sexy right now.

"Well, then, good night, Finn."

"'Night, Meredith. I'll call you later." As if on second thought, and with a sound of unholy glee, he announces to her, "We're kinda dating now, aren't we?"

"Yeah, I guess we kinda are," Meredith answers and smiles as something warm and fuzzy tickles her stomach. Absently, she rubs at it.

Such a strange, wonderful, awkward feeling. She remembers it vaguely, like a long forgotten dream, from when Derek used to smile at her. Before his smile was laden with a wife and before Meredith realized that no matter how happy she was, life was never _happily ever after_.

But this, strangely enough, feels a bit like it.

And Finn, of course—

"One more thing Meredith."

"Hmm? Yeah, what?" Meredith yawns much in the way Finn does and settles into back, curling her coverlet over her warming body.

"What are you wearing?"

She snaps up, laughing as she does. "Good_night_, Finn."

"Aw, come on. Since you're not going to give me real sex how 'bout some—"

Because she knows he expects her too, Meredith hangs up.

* * *

**notes:** don't hate me too much for putting Meredith and Finn together, k? I mean, it's _canon_ right? For now anyway. You know how fast Meredith goes through men, right? On the bright side, still a Meredith/Derek fan! Yay! I love them! But—

Meredith: you don't get to call me a slut.

WTF Derek?

God, is it Sunday yet?

**Reviews**

**ilajkajas2215:** I know how you feel. I can't see a fic entitled _Adderk_ without cringing. Maybe I'm a hypocrite. I just don't like Addison. No. Correction. I just don't like Addison with Derek.

**luv24+Alias:** I always feel bad for Derek, even when I don't want to. Which sucks because sometimes he deserves it.

**MeOh:** oh, don't get me wrong. I'm a hard-core Meredith/Derek shipper. I just think, for now, it be nice if Meredith tried to move on. Plus… you know… _Chris O'Donnell_.

**TivoforSteaveo:** sometimes I think Derek deserves a swift kick in the pants. But he always seems to recover in the best way, doesn't he? I mean, someone always wants him… but I can't blame them, I guess.

**Mary Kate113:** I've been in love with Chris O'Donnell since the _Three Musketeers_. Then _Batman_ came along… oh my God, Chris O'Donnell in leather. Dreams _do_ come true.


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